CREATIVE RETIREMENT
GREAT DECISIONS II
TOPIC -- Theme of Personal Interest Club
Friday Round Table Discussion Group

A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of 'why' our country is in trouble! 

1.          I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair 
wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!) 
  
2.          I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to 
explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then she interrupted me with, 
"I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts .." 

     Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , 
Capetown is in Africa "

     Her response -- click. 
  
3.          A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. 
I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an 
ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.

     He replied, 'Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!" (OMG) 
  
4.          I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada ?"

     I said, "No."

     She said, "But they look so close on the map." (OMG, again!) 
  
5.          An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. 
I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas .  
When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, 
and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time." (Aghhhh) 
  
6.          An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was 
possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.

     I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the 
concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that. 
  
7.          A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description 
on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, 'No, why do you ask?'

     She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that 
said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!"

     After putting her on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came 
back and explained the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the 
airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage. 
  
8.          A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over 
all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii ?" 
  
9.          I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know 
which plane to get on?"

     I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, 
but none of these planes have numbers on them." 
  
10.       A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to 
get on one of those little computer planes?"

     I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , FL on a commuter plane.

     She said, "Yeah, whatever, smarty!" 
  
11.     A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order 
to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa.
 'Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." 

     I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said,
 "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!" 
 
12.	A New Mexico Congress woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago
 to Rhino, New York."

     I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"

    "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady.

    After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport 
code in the country and can't find a rhino anywhere."

     The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!"

      So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo , 
do you?"

     The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal."


 Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it's in! 

 Could anyone be this DUMB? 

 YES, THEY WALK AMONG US, ARE IN POLITICS, AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED. 

	There is only one war, and it's not the rich against the poor, the
	blacks against the whites, the Federation against the Borg, or the
	Democrats versus the Republicans. It's those of us who aren't
	complete idiots against those of us who are.
 

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